Have you ever wondered why men behave a certain way, unlike what girls expect? Is it difficult for a woman to understand what men think and want? Do you need help understanding what both partners need in a relationship? Can we improve our personal relationships by understanding each other’s ways? The answers to all these questions can make any relationship very beautiful .
Today’s summary is based on a book dedicated to all women & all men. This book is Act Like a Lady Think Like a Man: What Men Think About Love, Relationships, Intimacy, and Commitment, written by Steve Harvey. In this summary, we are going to see some great and interesting topics from this book, like why men cheat, what they like the most, what is the real thing they want, what drives the man, the difference between the love of men and women, and much more .
The author of this book, Steve Harvey, is an American comedian, actor, author, and television and radio personality who first gained fame for his observational humor and later became known for his self-help advice, especially about relationships.
Harvey is one of the most recognizable and sought-after celebrities in the world. His relatable, honest, and inspiring personality has made him one of the most trusted personalities in the media. As a result, 178,000,000 US viewers welcome Steve Harvey into their homes yearly; that’s over 55% of the total U.S. population .
So you can understand why this book is so unique because Steve Harvey makes it special. And many give genuine advice by which one can live a good relationship or fix their lousy relationship.
So let’s begin .
Chapter 1: How men think
Men get away with a lot of stuff in relationships because women have never understood how men think. And this book has some valuable information to change all of this. Men have dozens of categories of needs and concerns in their lives that they are trying to get a handle on, like security, hopes for tomorrow, spirituality, body image, aging, friendships, children, work-life balance, education & many more .
Expect a man to respond to them the way a woman would never work. The one where you walk into a relationship thinking you are going to “change” your man is the worst and most doomed play. Why? Because no matter what other women say on the covers of magazines, television talk shows, and blogs. There are basic things in men that are never going to change .
With this book, you can get into a man’s mind and understand him better. And best of all, you can figure out if he plans to be with you or play with you. So act like a lady, and think like a man.
Chapter 2: The mindset of a man
Men are simple. Fix this into your head first, and everything you will see about men in this summary will begin to get you to understand better. But, once you get that down, you will also have to understand a few essential truths: men are driven by who they are, what they do, and how much they make.
Whether a man is a CEO or a CFO, everything he does is filtered through his title. Think about it: from the moment a boy is born, the first thing everyone around him starts doing is telling him what he must do to be a real man.
He is taught to be tough, wrestle, get up without crying, and not let anyone push him around. The pursuit of manhood stays the same once a boy is grown. It gets increased. His focus has always been on, and will remain on, who he is, what he does, and how much he makes until he feels like he has achieved his mission. And until a man does these things, women only fit into the cracks of his life.
He is thinking about settling down, having children, or building a home with anyone when he has everything in sync. If men are not chasing the “who they are,” the “what they do,” and the “how much they make,” they are doomed. In the words of the author, he is dead .
But the moment they figure out the puzzle and feel like their dreams are taking shape, new life breathes into them. It makes them vibrant. Encoded in the DNA of the male species is that they are to be the provider and the protector of the family, and everything they do is geared toward ensuring that they can make this happen.
If a man can afford a pair of sneakers for his child, he can feel confident enough to send the child to school so that his child will not get any leg problems. If he can afford vegetables at the grocery store, he can feel assured that he can feed his family.
Any man wants this; if anything less happens, he does not feel like a man. Even more, they want to feel like they are number one. They want to be The Best somewhere. They know they will not be the head man in every situation, but somewhere in their lives, they will be the one everyone answers to because it is that important to Man.
Men want bragging rights, the right to say, “I am number one.” Women do not seem to care about this so much. But for the men? It is everything. After they have attained that, it is critical that they can show off what they get for being number one. They want to show it off to women; otherwise, what is the use of being number one?
Because in his world, He is being judged by other men based on who he is, what he does, and how much he earns. And yes, this also affects men’s moods. If you know he is not where he wants to be, then his mood at the house will make more sense to you. He can not sit around talking with you or dream about family if his mind is on making money or getting a better position.
In the author’s experience, these facts do not always sit well with most women. Many of you figure that if a man truly loves you, the two of you should be able to pursue your dreams together. You must build the foundation of your relationship together, no matter the man’s station in life h
This is honorable, but it is not how men work. Men’s eyes will be on the prize, and that prize may only necessarily be you if he is up to where he wants to be. Man can’t focus on the two; they are just not that gifted.
Chapter 3: Woman’s love
Nothing on this planet can compare with a woman’s love; it is kind, compassionate, sweet, and, most important Pure. If you are her man, she will walk on water and through a mountain for you, too, no matter how you have acted out, no matter what crazy thing you have done. If you are her man, she will talk to you until no more words are left.
Hold you in her arms when you are sick, and laugh with you when you are at a reasonable level or in a good mood. And if you are her man and that woman loves you, she will shine you up when you are dusty.
And no matter what you do, no matter how many times her friends say you are no sound, no matter how many times you slam the door on the relationship. She will give you her very best and then some and keep trying to win over your heart, even when you have done everything to show her that she is not good enough for you. That is a woman’s love; it stands the test of time, logic, and all circumstance .
Ask any woman what kind of love she wants from a man, and you will get to hear something like this: I want him to be humble and intelligent, fun and romantic, sensitive and gentle, and, above all, supportive. I want him to look into my eyes and tell me I am beautiful and that I complete him.
I want a man who is vulnerable enough to cry when he is hurting, who will introduce me to his mother with a smile, who loves children and animals, and who helps me without asking to change diapers and wash dishes. And if he has a nice body and a lot of money, that would be great too, but this is optional .
He was expecting that kind of love, that perfection from a man, is unrealistic. Because a man’s love is not like a woman’s love, a man’s love is different, much more straightforward, direct, and more complicated. A man in love with you will probably not call you every half hour to tell you how much more he loves you. His love is still love, though.
It is just different from the love that women give. If you recognize how a man loves, you might find that he is standing in front of you and giving his all to you. So if he doesn’t give you the kind of love you want, please don’t think he doesn’t love you.
How do you know when a man loves you? Simple: he will do each of the following things. First, if your man loves you, He is willing to tell anybody and everybody, “Look, man, this is my woman” or “this is my girl.”
So, if you have been dating a guy for at least ninety days, and you have never met his mother, or you do not go to the temple together, or you have not been around his family or friends for much time. And most importantly, if he still introduces you to other people by your name, he does not see you in his future.
But the minute he assigns a title, the moment he lays claim to you in front of people who mean something to him in his life, whether it is his boy, his sister, or his boss, that is the minute you know your man is making a statement. He is professing his intentions for you and declaring them to the people who need this information. An announcement is critical; you will know if a man is serious about you once he claims you.
But remember what drives a man; real men do everything to ensure their family doesn’t get any problems. And if they are doing anything less than that, they are not men. Or is he not your man because he will eventually do this for someone else, maybe not for you?
Now, there are different ways to provide besides monetarily. Your man could be broke, but he will do everything possible to compensate for this by supplying your needs. If you are running low on groceries, he may not be able to give you money, but he will not let you go hungry. Providing for the ones he loves and cares about, monetarily or with sweat equity, is a part of a man’s DNA. And if he loves and cares for you, this man will provide all these things without limits.
When a man truly loves you, anybody who says, does, or even thinks about doing something offensive to you stands the risk of being obliterated. You pick almost any male species on the planet, and the same is true. Protection is not just about using brute, physical force against someone, though. A man who truly cares about or loves you can and will protect you in other ways. Whether it be with advice or stepping up to perform a task that he thinks is too dangerous for you.
A man’s love fits only into three categories. “The Three Ps of Love — Profess, Provide, and Protect.” He may not go shopping with you to buy a new dress for your office party. But a real man will escort you to that party, hold your hand, and proudly introduce you all around the party as his lady. He may not cuddle you and sit by the bed holding your hand while you are sick .
But a real man who loves you will ensure the medicines are taken carefully, make a bowl of soup, and ensure everybody is in position until you are better. And he may not willingly change diapers, wash the dishes, and rub your feet after a hot bath. But a real man who loves you sure will walk through a mountain and on the water before he would let someone bring any hurt or harm to you.
This much you can believe. Trust me, if you have a man who does these things for you, he is all in. And yes, if he does these things, please stop doubting him.
Chapter 4: The three things every man needs
Women are complicated creatures. It would help if you had stuff. And you expect your man to provide it, even if you have not explained what you need and want. Or even if what you needed and wanted five minutes ago is wholly different from what you need and want now.
The author has said over and over again jokingly that woman can only get satisfied if she gets four other men: an old one, an ugly one, a Mandingo, and a gay guy. Now the four of them combined? They covered you.
Now men, on the opposite, are straightforward creatures. It does not take much to make them happy. There are only three things that every man needs death, support, love, and “The Cookie.” Three things are it.
It is easy for a woman to give her man support, love, and intimacy because it is in her makeup; support and love are things that women do freely. So those three things come naturally to you. And this is all your man wants from you.
The more you make them feel special, the more they will give in return. A man needs that from his woman. He needs her to say, “Darling, I can not tell you how much I appreciate what you do for the kids and me.” Those simple words give man the strength to keep doing right by you and the family.
From working harder on the job to bringing home that salary To something as simple as a small task, they will do it more often if there is a reward in it. That reward does not cost you one red penny. It simply comes from the heart: “Thank you, baby. I appreciate you.”
You do not know how important that is for your man; that little encouragement makes him want to do more. You think because they are complex and do not want to cuddle, they do not need that encouragement, but they do.
Understand that man’s love is wholly different from a woman’s love. A woman’s love is emotional, nurturing, heartfelt, sweet, kind, and all-encompassing. And when she is in love with you, she is loyal to you; she can not see herself with someone else. That is a woman’s love. But for men, love is loyalty.
They want you to show your love to them by being loyal. That means that no matter what, you will stand beside them. If they get laid off, they know you will stay, even if they get a salary. You get around your girlfriends, and you will say with great enthusiasm, “that is my man. I’m loyal to him.”
Men need – Sex. They love it. They cannot live without it, and they need it continuously. Take their house and job, but please, do not hold out on the cookie. They do not care about anything else. They need to be physically engaged with the woman they love, who is loyal to them and supports them.
The emotional stuff – the talking, the cuddling, the holding hands, and bonding is all women’s thing. Men do those things because they know it is essential to their women. But please understand: the way men connect is by having sex. So try to give them the thing which they desire from the heart.
Chapter 5: Why men do what they do
He is trying to see if your “price” is too high because he wants to know whether he can get it tonight. If you do not lay out any requirements, then you are free; game on. He knows he can get you to bed with minimal effort. But if you tell him that you need his time, respect, and attention, he knows you are expensive. And that he is going to need to put in work to get the cookie.
A man fishes for two reasons: Sport fishing or fishing to eat. This means he will try to catch the biggest fish he can, take a picture of it, show it to his friends, and toss it back into the water. Or he will take that fish home, fry it up, and put it on his plate .
The way men see women is just the same as this. The important thing is that it is not the guy who determines whether you are a sports fish or a keeper; it is you. Do not hate the player; hate the game.
When a man approaches you, you have total control over the situation, whether he can talk to you, buy you a drink, dance with you, get your number, take you home, and see you again. They certainly want these things from you; that is why they started the talk with you .
But you decide if you will give the man any of the things they want. Where you stand in man’s eyes is dictated by your control over the situation. Every word you say, every move you make, your every signal will help him determine whether he should try to play you, be straight with you, or move on to the next woman .
One thing which is very important is that, if he is a responsible, thoughtful, loving son, he does not break away from his parents. Until that is, he finds a woman he loves and who loves him back. Be clear to everyone involved in your lives that they will respect your relationship and you.
How is he supposed to know that his interactions with his mother violate his wife’s standards? Men cannot read minds and are utterly incapable of anticipating what you want. So you have to speak up.
Often, the wife hesitates to speak about the violation of close relations boundaries. She is afraid that he may leave her, that if she tried to drive a wedge between her man and his mom, he would choose his mother over her.
But men do not work this way; if your man truly loves you and is a real man, he will figure out a way to get his mom on board with making his woman happy, to smooth everything out so that the relationship can work for all parties involved.
Why do Men Cheat? Ladies, here are the primary reasons why men cheat, but apart from that, there are many more. Of course, a man is always going to have a reason to justify why he is doing wrong, and those reasons will change from man to man and woman to woman. But, what is essential for you to understand, he knows that regardless of a man’s motives.
Women can go think about it in their minds, “I did not do this right,” “I was not good enough,” “I did not love him the way I should,” Means they try to find all types of deficiencies in themselves .
But the fact remains that all these things have no connection with cheating. So women need to release themselves from the blame of a cheating man’s actions; do that for yourselves. Because holding on to that baggage can be paralyzing; it can cripple you and stop you from moving forward. But you can limit the number of times you see cheating. See, you have a lot more power to restrict the things that happen to you. So what is that power?
You have the power of persuasion and your intuition management, and all of these will help you. If you let a man know up front that you will tolerate a lot of things, but cheating is not one of them, then he gets to see that if he steps out of the union, he stays out of it .
And it would help if you did it. And if he breaks that promise and steps out anyway? They have to be prepared to move on from him. So you have got to let either he go or find it in your heart to truly forgive the man .
Buy original book now: Act Like a Lady Think Like a Man.
9 thoughts on “Act Like a Lady Think Like a Man Book”
It was good read
बहुत मददगार साबित होगा ये summry हमारे लिए
Thankuuuu soo much sir